Monday, June 30, 2014

The End. ..of June

I missed May. I did the tag, I did the challenge, I made some cool things. I didn't, however, share them. I meant to and as usual life got in my way and I let it. I am hopefully getting better at prioritizing but it does not seem like it. I want to be better, I'm really really trying and it is definitely on the top of my many many lists of things to do. So its June and yes I understand this is the last day I did the tag I did the challenge naturally I still need the photograph but that'll be done before the end of this so I can get everything submitted and in its proper place and it'll give me a great feeling of accomplishment and I really really need more of those [feelings of accomplishments]. These past couple of months have  had me all over the place for so many reasons.
I'm saying happy belated birthday to my big brother, Bobby,worlds greatest big brother. and every year it gets harder I would like to say easier because everyone claims that time makes things easier but that is total crap.I have not gotten to the easy part of dealing with the death of my big brother and sister. I'll settle for sending him  happy birthday love and because I love him and continue to love him more than any other man in this whole wide world I won't sing it. He knew better than most that I was not blessed with a voice: he was and Kimm was. They sang beautifully together. I had no talents but that was never a bad thing no one ever had a cheering section like I was for my beautiful talented siblings. sorry tangent but Bobby has been on my mind a lot as usual and the month of June is always his month. I feel like a don't have my best friend my big brother my protector the one person that always made me feel safe no matter what was going on or how far away we were from one another. I always felt like if things got rough or hairy he would step in and  come to my rescue and make it all better and manage to get some pretty good laughs out of me while it was all going on. And I need that. These past two months have made me realize that I really miss being Shell and Bobby's little sister here in the physical world. I have gotten through all the bad the best I could but when Renee was attacked I know that they would have handled it better, made her feel safer. Made me seem a little more sane.  I do know with all of my heart I tried my very best.
Where Renee is concerned I always give 110%. Even in that situation I found a reason to thank the Goddess. She's alive, thank Goddess. The scar healed,  thank Goddess. The fear didn't paralyze us, thank Goddess. After dealing with those emotions and a million or so more I was able to get back to my desk again. It really is where I need to be. I finally have some clarity on that issue. More on that next entry. Let's end June with love, gratitude and peace. And as usual happy crafting.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Gwendolyn. Your cards are so pretty...each so different. I really enjoyed looking at them and I thank you for sharing them with all of us at CC3C. I also wanted to say that I read your post and I am so sorry for your loss of your big brother and sister. That is obviously such a painful thing to go through and I'm not quite sure we ever get "over it"...we get "through it". You commented that you were not talented and that all of the talent was found in your brother and sister. Gwendolyn, I think you are selling yourself far short and overlooking the wonderful talent you obviously have at card making or art. These cards and tag are beautifully done and bring joy to look at. So, thank you for sharing your story and your talent. I hope that each day gets a little easier for you. <3 Candy

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    1. Thank you so much,Candy. I think it shocked me more than anyone when I discovered scrapbooking and was good at it. I need to remember to not be super critical or judgemental of myself.

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